Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Cake for Breakfast??

This morning's breakfast was amazing.

chocolate peanut butter heaven...

I used Chocolate Covered Katie's dessert pizza recipe and just went all out :)

I mixed together:
  • 2 tbsp coconut flour
  • 2 tbsp garbanzo bean flour
  • 1 tbsp applesauce
  • 1 rounded tsp unsweetened cocoa powder
  • 1 tsp cacao nibs
  • 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • TINY pinch salt
  • 1/4 cup water
  • 1/4 tsp vanilla extract
  • drop of almond milk
Then I baked the concoction for about 15 minutes and topped it with "peanut butter syrup" aka 1/2 tbsp Better'n'PB, 1/2 tbsp coconut butter and 1/4 cup almond milk microwaved for 30 seconds and stirred up (sounds weird but trust me its delicioussssss). I poured the syrup over the chocolate blob and topped it with some banana chips for crunch and a squirt of whipped cream...since it was resembling cake anyway. why not? 

OMG was amazing. It just tasted like mushy delicious fantastic chocolate peanut butter cake. It was that good. Plus, the apartment smelled like a bakery. Since I'm always extra hungry in the morning I also had some egg whites with salsa :)

I notice when I eat a bigger breakfast with carbs and protein and healthy fats I have SOO much more energy not just in the morning but all throughout the day. I also notice I'm way less hungry throughout the day and don't crave sugar. 

It's hard to believe that a few years ago I used to just eat a bowl of cereal with some almond milk and maybe some strawberries and banana on top-that's IT!! Nothing but carbs and NO protein. I was usually starving about an hour (sometimes even sooner) after. Usually, I'd just have another bowl of cereal. Then I craved sugar and carbs throughout the day and would pick at JUNK. People are usually surprised at how much I eat for breakfast but since I've started having "bigger" (really, just more BALANCED) morning meals I've noticed such a positive difference in my hunger, energy and mood. 

Plus, today I worked out first thing in the morning on nothing but coffee, which usually leaves me STARVED.

Now I feel perfectly fueled and ready for another busy day of chores, work and class...won't be home until bedtime :(

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

I Did It!!!!!

All the gorgeous women 
Victory is MINE :)
I did it-I won my very first fitness competition! First place, baby!!!! The moment was SURREAL! I worked SO hard and truly gave it my all. For all that dedication to pay off just brought me to tears-- literally, on stage. When they handed me that trophy I just started balling! ( happiest tears ever!)

One of the best moments was hearing my sister scream the whole time!!! She was sooo loud I could hear that mouth of hers the whole time I was on stage. I loved it because hearing her voice was so comforting and gave me such a confidence boost. When my name was called for first she screamed out, "THIS IS HER FIRST SHOW!" Because, after all, doesn't that make anything that much more satisfying? To go into something brand new- for the very first time- and kill it!!!! Let me tell you, it's an incredible feeling. When my sister competes for her first time ( which I hope she will because she's a beautiful crazy lil fit chick herself) I owe her MANY, MANY screams.
My sister--BEST cheerleader EVER
I am SO blessed to have such an amazing support system. My crowd of cheerleaders included Dan, my sister, my parents, my friends Jackie and Gianna and of course, Greg, aka the best trainer in the universe, hands down. Greg was supportive of me from day one. He didn't just meet me once or twice a week to train and then send me off on my own. He motivated me every single day, even sending me motivational tweets! From the start he believed in me and told me I would do well. He critiqued my walk and gave me a million helpful tips. Along with sculpting my body to what it is now through intense training he also helped me build my confidence up to a place I never thought possible. If you want a sickkkkk trainer who will motivate the hell out of you and help you look and feel your best-Greg Watson at Equinox Fitness Club in Scarsdale NY is your guy.
beautiful & supportive friends <3
I'm off to the gym to get in a good workout before a long day of cleaning, cooking, errands and school!
world's best trainer!

Monday, September 12, 2011

Coffee vs Energy Drinks

First off, I am a caffeine queen. I LOVE it. Caffeine is definitely my biggest vice. As addicted as I am, I have cut down quite a bit. In high school my caffeine consumption was as such: 
Large or extra large dunkin donuts iced coffee in the morning on the way to school
2-3 diet cokes before lunch
1-2 diet cokes and or coffee after lunch
Red bull before going out and red bull and vodka when out

In college, it increased a little:
A sugar free red bull or other energy drink on the way to class, or sometimes on the way to dunkin....
Coffee before or after class (extra large dunkin) or both
Several ( or way more) cans of diet coke throughout the morning/ early afternoon
Another energy drink and coffee before and again during work
Medium or large coffee or 2 during night classes
More coffee after class if I went out with friends

In college I was a commuter and the money on my meal card was NEVER used because I always packed my own food. So to utilize the money ( I never let it go to waste) I stocked up on fuel for my awful caffeine habit. I bought a ton of 12 pack cases of diet soda cans. Sometime I just carried the case with me from class to class and popped them open throughout the day. I always had a case or two in the trunk of my car for emergencies. 

Finally, around my college graduation I realized how bad this habit was. I relied on my blood pressure to tell me if the caffeine was getting out of hand; if it went up I'd cut out some caffeine. Because I was such an avid runner ( a serious distance runner at that time) and gym rat my blood pressure stayed consistently around 110-20 over 60-70. Finally I realized that I was lying to myself-- the caffeine intake was really extreme and something had to be done. 

I'm really good at quitting things cold turkey ( it's how I stopped smoking, cut out fake sweetener, dairy, etc). I had already cut out the splenda, which led to way less coffee because I wasn't used to the bitter taste yet, but I was supplementing coffees with diet cokes- even worse.  So out went ALL the soda!! At first my headaches were outrageous and I was really cranky. I realized I slowly started adding in more energy drinks. 

Finally I found a balance which has led me to where i am now in terms of caffeine:
Big cup of iced coffee or 2 smaller cups of hot coffee after breakfast ( apparently it's not good for your metabolism to drink something caffeinated with a meal)
A sugar free or calorie free energy drink before a workout ( sometimes an iced coffee instead)

Usually I have my coffee with a teenie splash of non dairy milk, but now I just drink it black. Flavored coffee is actually, dare I say...better black. The flavor overrides the usual bitterness. 

Thanks to training for this competition, though, I've nixed the energy drinks. I'm eating so clean that I figured I'd nix the artificial stuff for now. So pre workout is just a big iced coffee. At first I was annoyed because I felt like the coffee just didn't deliver like the energy drinks did. I never ever got jittery from them I just got some energy. I'm very ADHD so my body responds pretty well to caffeine, it focuses me and never makes me jittery. After a week of only coffee, even though I'm taking in LESS caffeine,  i feel way better and more energetic! Plus, I never get that bloated or crampy feeling in my stomach that I sometimes get from energy drinks. 

This is not to say I'm mixing energy drinks forever (weird as it is, sometimes I crave a Monster Zero, I actually LOVE the flavor) but they're definitely out of my daily routine for good. I'm going to stick to the twice a day black coffee thing. I think my body responds way better to it. Maybe once a week before a Saturday morning workout I'll cave and go for a Monster Zero. But for now, coffee it is! 

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Food FIT for FALL

  The other night before dinner I was feeling a little bored but had the urge to cook something. I'm still eating the same thing every day for one more week so I decided to make something for Dan. He's trying to eat as healthy as possible but sometimes it's hard because his schedule is so crazy. So I figured I would make him some healthy granola. It's good because he can add it to his cereal in the morning for lasting energy PLUS it's totally portable so he can bring it to work without worrying about refrigerating or reheating.

So to make sure it'd be healthy it had to have a balance of:
healthy fats

Granola can be LOADED with fat and sugar...which is usually what makes it so delicious :(

So instead of oil I used egg whites, which also adds in some extra protein. For sweetness I combined a tablespoon of pure maple syrup with a tablespoon of farm fresh honey and added a little water for a less thick consistency. To make sure it was still packed with flavor I added a TON of cinnamon and pumpkin pie spice to the dry oats.

This granola is yummy, good for you and fuels your body without added fats or sugar! Plus it tastes like FALL. Perfect for transitioning into the new season!



  • 2 cups oats (I used quick cook)
  • 1 T pure maple syrup
  • 1 T honey
  • 2 heaping T water (more if you need)
  • 1 heaping tsp cinnamon
  • 1 heaping tsp pumpkin pie spice
  • 3 T egg whites
  • 3/4 cup walnuts
  • 3/4 cup macadamia nuts
  • 3/4 cup freeze dried blueberries

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Combine oats, spices, nuts and berries in one bowl and mix. In a separate bowl combine all wet ingredients, mix well. Pour wet ingredients over oat mixture and stir until well combined. Spread mixture out onto a parchment paper lined baking sheet (if you like your oatmeal on the sweeter side, drizzle it with some more maple syrup now). Bake for 20 minutes, stirring it up at the 10 minute point.
before baking 
combining wet & dry

Let sit at room temperature so it becomes nice and crispy!
packed & ready to go!

Every season has it's own selection of food unique to its time of year. Fall happens to have some of the best my favorites:

Butternut Squash
Sweet Potatos
candy corn 

I can't help it!! There's absolutely nothing healthy about it and usually it's everyone's least favorite candy but for whatever reason I just LOVE candy corn. I love every single flavor and even those waxy little candy corn pumpkins! In the fall I usually always have candy corn on me...hiding in my purse or car or somewhere. A few little triangles here and there are NOT going to kill me. ;)

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Back At It!!

My first week of class is officially over!

I loved it!

My classes seem great so far, and I couldn't be happier to be a part of the counseling program!! I can tell that I'm going to learn a lot this semester, and though it will be a lot of work I'm going to enjoy it.

The days I have class are pretty busy, though. Tuesday I woke up at 5am to get to the gym by around 5:20. I got dressed, grabbed my iced coffee from the fridge (it makes life soo much easier when you set the little things up the night before), grabbed my workout journal and off I went.
not too bad for a before-coffee shot
pure joy in a cup
training log
I love working out at the crack of dawn for several reasons-first, Dan is there! He's up waaay before 5am, with a TON of energy--so much energy that he does his own workout at home before the gym even opens. I can bang out  an early workout, but that's pushing it. I also love it because I love the feeling of looking at the clock at 7am and feeling SO accomplished! Gym, shower, hair, makeup, all out of the way before the day even starts! Plus, the gym is nice and calm and quiet at that hour and most of the people who are there are in the group fitness classes...meaning I get all the equipment all to myself! Can't beat that!

After the gym I ate my boring teenie little breakfast and ran off to catch the 8:02 train. I got into the city at around 8:30 and had a couple errands to do before my first class. It was a pain in the butt carrying a giant cooler and gallon jug of water around all day from class to class though. Oh well, only one more week of that! I got home at 8:30pm and was so happy to just snuggle with Dan, take a melatonin and relax for the evening!

Wednesdays are much easier, since I don't have class until 5pm. I did some chores around the house, stopped at Trader Joe's for the usuals and hit the gym for a training session all before class.
much cuter when gymmin it at noon instead of 5am...
It's a busy two days in a row! Its nice to have a semi-long weekend to unwind, go through the readings and then get back into it the following week. The days I'm not in class I do work at the gym for the day so I don't totally have a full day off until the weekend. But my two minute commute from home to work at the gym definitely feels like a break when compared to driving or training into the city!!


Food in Class?

Ever since high school, I've always needed something with me to eat or drink during a class. Maybe it's the comfort or distraction of having something to nosh on? I also HATE eating while driving- I'm horrible at it. Plus, I really like to savor and enjoy every bite when I eat so inhaling something while the majority of my focus is on the road just does not appeal to me.

The problem with my eating in class habit is what I eat. When people eat in class (trust me when I say I ALWAYS observe people when they eat-- what are they eating?, how are they eating it?, why didn't they finish that?, do they realize how bad that is for them?, ooo that looks dang good....etc) I notice they typically eat snacky, not so healthy things that usually come out of a bag that has been sitting in a vending machine. I'm not a vending machine girl. Never have been. Since I was little my mom ALWAYS packed me not just a lunch but snacks and drinks as well-- she never gave me lunch money so vending machines were never an option. When I had my own money, and they were an option I just didn't want them, I preferred packing my own food.  So my class snacks are a bit divergent from vending machine fare.  I'll never forget one time in undergrad I brought dinner to a night class, it was a container of lentil soup that I wrapped in a huge ball of tin foil to keep warm, and ate with a silver spoon I brought from home. When I unwrapped it the smell of the soup permeated the whole classroom and I heard a girl sitting near me whisper to her friend, "omg..that b*tch is seriously eating lentil soup right now".  Sorry, but that soup fueled me for class a lot better than a  seventy-five cent bag of Fritos would have!!

I guess the things I bring to class may seem a bit odd, or stinky, to others. You'll usually catch me munching on containers of steamed veggies, veggie burgers, chicken breast and salad, scrambled egg whites cooked the night before, variations of fruit and last semester I even ate spaghetti squash with tomato sauce and turkey meatballs in class (that one got some looks).

a typical b-fast..eggs, veg, it up & take it along!

Another reason I eat in class so often is because I time my meals. I like to eat 5 or 6  times a day- at least-and I make sure never to go more than 3 hours without eating. So if that time falls in the middle of class, sorry but I'm not going to keep my body waiting and risk slowing my metabolism, I'm going to open my stinky container of broccoli and chicken and whip out a fork and napkin and nosh while I note take. The stares don't bother me, I stare at you when you eat too. A lot of people usually end up asking me about it, too.

" That looks good! What is that?"
"That looks, what is that?"
"I notice you eat a lot! I heard that's really healthy, how do you remember to eat? I always forget when I'm busy"
"wow, did you make that?"
"how do you eat that cold?! Does is still even taste good?"

To that last one, no, it's never as good cold!! But it is still yummy, just not as yummy. Usually, I find a microwave somewhere....sneaking into teacher lounges.

This week and next week at school I'm going a little overboard though, and even I feel a little ridiculous. My meals are so structured this close to show time and Tuesday I'm in school all day long so every meal from my second to my last have to come with me in a big giant cooler. So Tuesday's I'm a total bag lady with my bag of books on one shoulder and giant orange cooler on the other- oh yeah, it's bright orange.

Last night in class our teacher told us we could not eat. This is the first time I've ever experienced this rule enforced. The class goes from 5 pm to 7:35 pm -- hello, dinner time!? Before 5 is too early for me and I don't get home until a little after 8 which is too late.  So I'll be bringing my dinner anyway and sneaking out into the hallway for a few minutes to quickly go enjoy my pre packed dinner.  Hey, you do what you gotta do, right?

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Happy Birthday to My Love

Happy Birthday Dan!!!
first birthday cake i made for him-3 years ago!

I love the way our birthdays are-- mine, at the end of June, kicks off the summer and Dan's, at the start of September kicks off the end of the season. Plus, he is a Virgo and I'm a Cancer..a match made in astrological heaven. :)

Since Dan is turning 35 today, here is a list of 35 things I love about him:

1. His honesty

2. His drive

3. His motivation

4. How handsome he is!!!

5. His sense of humor! He's so sarcastic. Every. Single. Day. He makes me laugh...not just a little giggle, every day, at some point, he has me hysterical laughing. I think I take this for granted a lot. He's the only guy I've ever been with who REALLY makes me laugh, that is not easy to find!

6. He has great taste-- from his personal style to food...and women, obviously ;)

7. I LOVE his body!!

8. He is conscious of his diet...he eats really well and healthy-- not your typical fried-food- and- sixpack-of-beer guy

9. He likes wine

10. He's a hotel snob

11. He likes the beach!

12. He's an amazing cook.

13. He treats me like a princess :)

14. He gets along with my family!
even the baby of the family

15. He's SO smart, our conversations are always intriguing and he inspires me to make the most out of my education

16. He proofreads all my papers for me....even if it's just a one paragraph abstract.

17. He's super anal and type-A but for some reason, it's not irritating at all, it's cute :)

18. He looks really cute with a little stubble on his face

19. He dresses well and always look amazing whenever we go out, even if it's just running errands during the day

20. He leaves me random little notes around the apartment

21. He's a great workout buddy

22. He likes to try new things

23. He likes history (this is important because so do I)

24. He's super passionate about his career

25. He always smells incredible

26. I love his smile

27. I love his eyes, too

28.  He's always there to listen to me when i need to vent

29. He's really good at helping me fix my problems

30. He compliments me :)

31. He's always on time!

32. He's reliable

33. He has a positive outlook on life

34. He's loyal

35. He hasn't gotten sick of me and my crazy antics yet!!!!
maybe i drive him a liiiiittle crazy

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Countdown to Cupcakes

Eleven days to go! I'm so excited and so nervous and most importantly so excited to eat something different! I already have a grocery list about a mile long and cannot wait to go shopping!

I live in the grocery store these days, however, I buy the same exact things every single time I go week after week after week. I'm sorry but there is simply no joy or excitement left in buying spinach and egg whites. As much as I absolutely love these things, picking them up and loading a card with about fifty packages of them has finally become unbearable. Not really, but it's pretty damn boring. You don't realize how exciting it is to go to the grocery store until you've become limited to buying the same five or six things for months!

So basically, every time I see something I want to buy that isn't on my diet I add it to my ever growing "fall grocery list". It's a simple joy that gives me something exciting to look forward to after so much time spent being so restrictive. Everyone asks me what i want to eat when this is over and what kind of food am I looking forward to. Everyone has the SAME expectations, they all think I want to totally binge out on every kind of junk!! I know I'm on a boring diet, but I wasn't eating junk before the diet! So why would I want to eat junk now??? Yea, ok, I got a little out of hand with the wine and dessert on the weekend, but besides that I was my usual health nut self. I was eating a lot of veggies, seafood, protein shakes, tons of egg whites (omelets, hard boiled, etc), greek yogurt, Ezekiel bread, nuts & nut butters and fruit. I rarely indulged during the week and if I did it usually consisted of post dinner snacking on cereals and nut butters.

However, i was looking forward to ONE junky thing at the end of this...a cupcake.
i heart you

UNFORTUNATELY this whole experience has led me to the discovery that I'm severely lactose intolerant. Before the diet my stomach was ALWAYS bothering me!! I was constantly bloated, or achey or nauseous or something. I didn't know where it was coming from. A few years ago I drank a lot of diet soda and put splenda in everything. When I realized that artificial sweeteners were the cause of horrendous stomach pains I cut it ALL out cold turkey. But then my stomach problems returned and I had no idea what caused it. I didn't eat much dairy aside from some Greek yogurt here and there, which bothered my stomach, but so did everything else so I didn't attribute it to lactose intolerance. I didn't realize how many foods actually have trace amounts of dairy in them. For example, every time I went out to dinner I'd get stomach pains. Whenever I ate something I didn't make myself I noticed I had pains. Only when I started my diet did I realize that I only had pains after I drank skim milk with my protein shake and after I ate Greek yogurt. At no other time did I feel it. I started taking a Lactaid pill before each serving of dairy and at first it helped. I still got bloated though I just didn't have the unbearable pain.  Finally I realized why am I doing this? If I have to take a pill before I can eat something, I should not be eating it!! So out went the dairy.

Back to my cupcake.

I realized it wasn't going to happen. Do you know what goes into a cupcake???? Butter. :( A ton of it. Do you know what butter is? Cream. I think. Either cupcake. Or so I thought.

How in the world did I forget about the wonderful, amazing concept of vegan baking?! They don't use dairy!! Luckily for me there is an amazing, very well known vegan bakery right here in the city!! Babycakes!! I cannot wait to walk off that stage and go enjoy a ridiculous little cupcake without taking a pill first and without suffering after.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Back to School!

Today I've been trying to get myself organized and ready to take on the semester. My first day of class is in TWO days!!

I'm excited to start this semester because it's a complete fresh start. Last year I started hard school in a research focused psychology program. I found myself really unhappy in the program because I felt isolated and didn't have much oppurtunity for one on one counseling. I thought research would be a great way to help people by contributing new ideas and information to the field. Of course, that is true, but you miss out on a lot of interpersonal interaction. I realized that my heart and passion lies in one on one counseling and I transferred programs.

I was officially accepted into the Counseling for Mental Health and Wellness program last semester but I only took two electives. This semester I'm diving head first into this amazing new program and I couldn't be happier!

Usually I'm prepared for the semester way ahead of time but this time around I'm totally slacking. I haven't had the energy or patience to drive into the city. Tuesday I have to take an extra early train (I'm so NOT a train girl! I much prefer to drive down but when my classes are during rush hours I suck it up and train it) so I can get my new student ID before class. I also have to make a pit stop at th bookstore for m text books...and some more hoodies (I can't control myself around them! Warm snuggly oversized campus bookstore hoodies have always just screamed "BUY ME" at me!). I'm planning on making a quick trip to Walgreens after church today fo some notebooks.

However, I do have the really important stuff covered--manicure appointment and outfit ready. I'm a total dork and plan my school outfits for the week every weekend durin the semester. I have to! I realized this in undergrad. I went to a catholic high school where I wore a uniform so choosing outfits on a daily basis was never an issue for me. For the passed 5 years I've worked at a gym so all I wear to work is stretchies. In undergrad I was completely overwhelmed by the task of picking out daily outfits. It was too much of a process so all I wore to class was soffees, stretchies and hoodies. Most of the time, though, I hit the gym either righ before or right after class so 90% of the time I was just in gym clothes. Half that time I was even still sweaty from a workout...haha ew.

In grad school, especially in the city, people are just a tad more professional looking than sweaty gym clothes. Plus I only have class to days a week. I might as well dress somewhat presentable right? Besides, Dan is working close to my campus now so there will always be the chance of meeting for a bite to eat or taking the train home together. He wears a suit to work and there's nothing worse than looking like a sweaty lil bum next to a hottie business man. Not okay. I'll put in the littl extra effort on Sunday afternoons to lay out some outfit choices.

Random thought....I'm on day two of no carbs and so far haven't morphed into a psychobiatchh yet. Woo hoooo :)

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Overcoming a Bad Day

Today I'm blogging from the beach. It's a beautiful day and I feel happy, 
relaxed and in good spirits (which is surprising because carbs were just removed 
from my diet-14 days till Showtime!-so I had anticipated being kind of cranky).
love skywriting at the beach!
Yesterday, however, wasn't so peaceful. Do you ever have those days where no 
matter what you just can't snap out of your misery??? My morning got off to a rushed 
start when I misplaced my house keys. I had just finished a tough legs session 
with my trainer and had an hour to kill before work. I went to my boyfriends 
apartment to enjoy breakfast and some nice alone time to relax a bit before 
starting my shift. As soon as I got to the apartment I realized my keys were at 
my house. Oops. So I spent the free hour racing back and forth, scarfed down 
breakfast in minutes and off to work I went...a little late. 

I forgot my keys and a few other things throughout the morning and my head just 
felt like a cloud after an explosion!!! A big poof of air with little particles 
floating around in no particular direction. 

After work my mom wanted to go shopping so I figured a little retail therapy and 
doing my makeup and getting dressed would make me feel better. For whatever 
reason it didn't. Looking in the mirror, all I could see was this ugly girl 
staring back. So i tried my best to cover her up with globs of dark eyeshadow, 
liner and mascara. That didn't work. 

I was just off, feeling down on myself and couldn't shake it! My mind starting 
racing obsessing. I nitpicked every last feature and every inch 
of my body in negative ways. I thought about possible ways to compensate for my 
supposed "flaws":

   Maybe I need botox?

   I should get like twenty layers of a spray tan

   I'd look SO much better with permanent hair and eyelash extensions

   Who am I kidding? I need to start wearing makeup everyday

   I don't even want to eat

   I'm not working out enough

When I noticed my mind going back to those places (the eating and exercise 
obsessions) I knew I was falling into the mind game trap. Even though in the 
moment I didn't believe them, I repeated some positive affirmations. I Reminded 
myself that none of this nonsense is true! It's all mind games. 

When I got back to Dan's apartment after shopping I was starting to feel better, 
but still a little off. I sat in the other side of the room, curled up in a ball 
and ignored him. Eventually I realized what I was doing and felt bad for taking 
it out on him. Later in the night we ended up talking and snuggling. 

He blamed my mood on my nervousness and anticipation for the show. He reminded 
me that every time I have a goal for myself I borderline-obsessively put 100% of 
everything I have towards achieving that goal. Being a perfectionist can be a 
problem sometimes...

He was completely right! I was anxious about the show and how I would do and I 
let that thought consume me. Worrying that I may not win first place made me 
feel like I'm not good enough. That carried into my day and me feel not 
"pretty/muscular/smart" etc. enough. 

But that's not true. Those mind games are dangerous and can completely consume 
you! It's important to be aware of these thoughts and know that they're 
irrational. Repeating positive affirmations has helped me. 

I went to bed thinking positive and reminded myself that tomorrow is a new day, 
and I'm blessed to be here! 

no makeup...not so terrible ;)

Thursday, September 1, 2011


sixteen days....15 tomorrow. Until my first fitness competition!

i have been training and dieting my heart out since MAY. this is a little under half a year that i have been eating the same. exact. thing. every day for six meals a day. day in and day out.

the training, however, has been amazing!

in the beginning, i loved the diet! it was clean, healthy and light and made me feel really good. i have always been a clean, healthy eater but in all honesty i defintely fell a little off track this past year. over the holidays i indulged literally every chance i got! in february, my sister and i planned a last minute spring break trip to miami. i had exactly two weeks to prepare. i kicked up the cardio and made sure i hit the sac before i cancelled out the day's workout with late night munching (i have a serious problem...). i think i looked good in miami, but i fell right back into that rut and drank almost every night. wine, shots, miami vices, mojitos

my sister.."lil bitch" ;)
 the wine and snacking were out of control. after miami i was still in a kind of spring break-y party mood and hadn't yet gotten over that holiday indulgence bug. every weekend that my boyfriend and i went out to dinner we would split a bottle of wine (plus one or two pre and post dinner drinks for me...) and then on the way home we would stop at 7/11 to pick out an entemenns cake! once we got home we grabbed some forks and went to town on the damn thing. we're good all week, we work out like maniacs and eat light and healthy all week...why cant we have fun on the weekends??

martini hiding in the corner
it was that mentality that led me to 22% body fat in may. now, that's technically not that bad, but for me (i'm pretty hard on myself) that's way, way up there. i like to stay somewhere between 16-19%.

at that point things came together and i decided i was ready to compete. i got my diet and started working with my trainer and got myself back on track! a month later i was down to 12% body fat!! yeah, it happens that fast when you take out all the way too much weekend wine and treats. :(

In the beginning the diet was sooo exciting!! i loved it! i felt SO good to be back on my healthy track and fueling my body with the clean, wholesome, nutrient dense food it deserved. but now, almost five months later...i just can't wait to change it up!

no, i won't be going back to wine and entemenn's, and i don't miss it.

i'm craving variety healthy variety...not so much junk.
when this diet is over, in sixteen days, i can't wait to eat:
  • pumpkin!!! fortunately for me it will be deliciously right in season!
  • warm, gooey, satisfying oatmeal...steel cut, oat bran, any variety....filled with delicious fresh and frozen fruits and cinnamon and nuts
  • bananas 
  • peanut butter....and every other form of nut butter
  • going to go apple picking and devour the whole orchard
could there be a possible reason why everything i'm craving happens to be in the same color family? i see that i'm craving pretty much carbs and fats :) not suprised!

but mostly i can't wait to get back in the kitchen and cook up some delicious new meals and treats for dan and me to enjoy on the weekends. there's nothing i love more than spending a saturday night in with my man, lighting some scented candles, cooking together, sharing stories about our day or whatever, sipping some champagne and hanging out together for the night

plus, all i do is clip recipe after recipe after recipe and stuff them away like a squirrel for when the dieting is over...and after almost five months of this, he's getting a little impatient hah ;)